Welcome back to school!

I have twice as many kids this year, so this should be interesting...


boy 1 to boy 2: "I'm a little young to have a drinking problem."
boy 2: "You're addicted to CapriSun, that's all I'm sayin'."
boy 1: "I DON'T NOT HAVE A DRINKING PROBLEM!"




"You know what else I'm wearing? My detachable thumb."




(in art class)
boy 1: "This looks so cool!"
girl 1: "This is awesome!"
boy 2: "This smells really bad."





Me, to art class: "NO sniffing Sharpies!"
(quiet pause)
boy: "But wait... can I still breath?"




"Mine looks like a bunch of old ladies!"