Wouldn't dream of it...

boy 1 to girl 1: "You're not my mom, so don't dress me!"








"Ew, it's a scorpion! Oh wait... that's a lobster."








"What's that (quote) from? A Racecar Name Desire?"








"I have very sensitive cubicles."








"They're having a moonwalk battle."








"I'm having a hard time because Pennsylvania is so large. I'm like, 'What are you, China?' "








"Green Yoda is, yes."








"Yoda talk like me, I."








"(Boy's name) talk Yoda... not. will."









"Did you know there's a Mrs. Yoda?"








"What is he, a special gecko with a tricked out cave?"

oh... burn!

"Would you like some ice for that third-degree BURN?"








"Now that's COLONIAL swag."








"That amendment says no quartering of troopers."








(This one comes from a future middle-schooler- another class was using my room for presentations, and I got to witness this...)
boy 1: "(Jefferson Davis) was a little like me in his childhood."
boy 2: "How?"
boy 1:  "Except I didn't work on a cotton plantation."
teacher: "Then how?"
boy 1: "Well, I might be president someday."
(long pause)
girl 1: "How did (Jefferson Davis's) wife die?"
boy 1: "I don't know- maybe she wasn't taking care of herself."








"I veto chihuahuas! They shiver and it's weird."








"You smell like... Albertson's."

oh, really?

"Look at my tongue! My tongue is awesome!"

"Stubby Thriller arms!"

"We should have muzzles..."

"Hey guys, let's switch personalities!"

Boy1 about boy 2, to me: "Mrs J, (he) is self conscious because he's going through puberty."

me: "You're ALL going through puberty."

boy 1: "Yeah, but he's going through puberty on his face."

"You could dye your head bald!"